a.connor  a.doyle  a.lindsey  a.oz  a.spike  a.wesley  a.xander  a.other  three.somes  het.fic  character.study           
Title: Kisses
Author: Liz Harris
Pairing: Angel/Wes
Rating: R
Setting: S2 AtS



Angel got up from the bed and began to get dressed.
Wesley sat up against the pillows stiffly, unsure how
to behave. He was usually asleep for this part. The
part where Angel crept out of bed in the middle of the
night and went home after their time together.

They didn't make love- they never made love. It was
always sex. Rough, hard,
I-don't-know-you-you-don't-know-me sex. As if they
were different people when they touched. No longer
dark, broody heterosexual men of the world. As soon as
Angel came through Wesley's door it was fevered kisses
on various parts of the body, searching tongues, and
the occasional bit of laughter or gasp of shock as one
lover tried something new.

But as suddenly as it began, it would end. Angel would
get up and get dressed while a worn out Wesley slept
the rest of the night away. But not tonight. Wesley's
stamina had apparently increased and he was still
wide-awake. All his senses were painfully alert.
Including his sense of pride.

"Leaving, are you?"

Angel said nothing for a moment. "I've got to go."

Of course he did. There was always somewhere else he
had to be.

"Without even a kiss goodbye?"

Angel stood still. The moonlight had turned him into a
wax image of himself. It made the scene seem unreal.
Wesley almost felt he could say anything in his heart
at this moment and it would be OK. There would be no
consequences.

In all their time together Angel had never kissed him
on the mouth. It was the only vice in their
relationship. That and the fact that there was no
relationship. Wesley had tried to kiss him once, in
the beginning; Angel had turned his head away and
after a stillness and a silence that seemed to stretch
for ages Angel slowly slid his body down and began to
suck on Wesley's cock. All thoughts of kisses flew out
of Wesley's mind and he didn't think about it till
later on.

The words hung in the air and taunted Wesley. Pulled
at his lips and eyelids till he was all too aware of
the huge mistake he'd just made. Had they been visible
he would have snatched them up like the mischievous
sprites they were and shoved them in his pocket before
Angel could see them. But they weren't.

Angel walked over to where Wesley was sitting and
kissed him. On the mouth. Just a kiss. No large hand
on his thigh, no fingers digging into his flesh, no
mouth sucking his fingers. It wasn't even a hard, lips
smooshed to lips kiss. It was soft and short and
almost normal. As if he were more than just something
to hold Angel over till Buffy. As if they were lovers
in the true sense of the word.

When Angel pulled away Wesley could do nothing but sit
and stare. His bitterness was gone, replaced by the
burn of Angel's lips. Perhaps burn was the wrong word.
Cold things don't burn. However they can certainly
leave a lasting impression. They can scar and maim and
leave you wanting more. They can freeze you out and
refresh your mind. It's jagged and harsh or slick and
soft.

They stared at each other. The silence stretched for
ages.

Wesley felt the need to do something (anything). He
stood slowly, blue eyes locked on brown. "Don't do
that unless you mean it." He was not going to be toyed
with. Well, at least, not anymore. No more taking
shelter behind his intelligence or pretending
everything was going just how he wanted it.

Angel stepped closer; Wesley could feel himself recoil
inwardly as Angel closed the hairsbreadth between them
by pressing his lips against Wesley's. Was he really
going to do it again?

It was just as soft as the first time. Not timid or
shy, just soft. There wasn't the bodily hunger in it
like they'd shared so many times before- this was
something new. A strange unfamiliar territory neither
of them wanted to venture into but found that, once
the path was in front of them they didn't just walk
down it- they ran.

Angel opened his mouth slightly and Wesley did the
same. Putting his hands up, cradling Angel's face
Wesley pressed harder. Angel would not be allowed to
escape this time. Wesley turned Angel toward the bed
and pushed him down onto it. There would be no
sneaking out while Wesley slept, no avoiding eyes in
the light of day, and no fear of kisses. This time
they would do it right.

-End

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