(Taken with permission from Te's Blog)

_{Blessed are the Snarktious}

...for they shall keep me sane:
 

TEN PROPOSED NEW LAWS FOR THIS CRISIS:
 

1. To buy an American flag, you must present proof you have voted at 
least once in the last three elections (yes, local and state elections count).
 

2. To display an American flag in any form, you must present proof of 
voter registration.
 

3. To wave an American flag in public, you must be able to name at least 
one of the following: 
A. One of your U.S. Senators 
B. Your U.S. Representative 
C. Your President ("George Bush" does not count; ambiguous)
 

4. To sell any product with an American flag on it, you must answer the 
following question correctly: The Bill of Rights is part of: 
- the Constitution;
- the Magna Carta;
- the Declaration of Independence.
 

5. Those heard singing patriotic songs in public may be asked to show 
their voter registration cards.
 

6. To be permitted to scream "Nuke Afghanistan," you must be able to 
correctly locate Afghanistan on a map or globe.
 

7. To be permitted to scream "Arabs go home," you must list and correctly 
locate ten Arab homelands.
 

8. Those who wish to express opinions about Arabs and Arab-Americans must pass the following test: 
 

A. Those who follow the religion of Islam are called:
- Muslims 
- Muslins
- Fanatics
 

B. The holy book of Islam is called:
- The Koran
- The Koram
- The Bible
 

C. In Arabic, God is called:
- Ali
- Allah 
- Jehovah
 

9. Priority for purchase of American flags will be given to those whose 
ancestors lived on American soil the longest. When all American Indians 
who wish to display the red, white and blue are satisfied, other 
applicants will be accepted.
 

10. A call for war on any radio talk-show will be construed as a public 
declaration of willingness to enlist in the US Army; callers will have 24 
hours to complete the paperwork.

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